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Hummm... what to say... an endless streak of mishaps... Had a fender bender with the neighbor across the street... Good thing is I've known her since we were little kids.. and she said we would work something out... *sighs* Wouldn't be so worried if I had car insurance (which I had every intention upon getting once I came up with the money to do so) I haven't heard anything about it in a few days... So.... worry worry worry.. what's gonna happen... am I gonna get a ticket and go before a judge or are they gonna impound my car? Hummmm... Well the very same day I got a call stating I am now employed... ironic.. yes... it is... God I hate being poor... This job is a start yes... but... a PT Cashier job at a Hardware store?? Again.. it's a start...



As for my love life... I have found myself growing quite attached to someone. He's the most interesting, beautiful man I have met, inside and out... Someone whom I have told all my secrets to... *and I've never done that before* But the problem is... he's across the pond.. which we are working together on fixing... even his parents are accepting of me and are all for me coming for a visit for the Holidays... But will I be enough?? Will I be what he expects?? Will I be what he truly wants or am I just setting myself up again?? All these thoughts run through my head... I still have those feelings of wanting to run... My mind tells me to run.. that it's all gonna blow up in my face again, but my lonely heart tells me otherwise... which do I follow??



Hummm.. what else... what else... nope.. thats an update for now... Time will tell if my streak of badluck will continue or if the gods will lift the curse... I truly believe someone has cursed me... because I haven't had this much bad luck *meaning the past 2 yrs* in my entire life...

Got in touch with an old friend that I hadn't seen since 1996.... I've known him since we were in grade school... OMG people change sooooo much in a short amount of time.... I don't think I have changed at all.. and he even said I was the same ol' "weird" chick from back in the day... (lol)



Anywho... we met at a bar and then went back to his place and stayed up all night talking about the good ol' days... and watching movies.... (lol) I didn't get home till 10am the next morning.... so I am.... "Dead ass tired" and to top that off... my aunt's car's aren't working and she had a doctors apointment in a town about 20 mins away... no prob right.. I'm still young and can do the no sleep thing.... ohhh.. I just thought we were gonna go to the doctor's and come home.. boy o' boy was I wrong.... we ran around till 2pm.... and then.. I get a message about a job application I put in and they want an interview today... I'm like.. um..... what time... 5:30pm... oh okay... no problem....."Aunty wake me up at 4:30pm so I can go the interview." Needless to say I got the job... woooo hooo... now I'm one of the mindless working stiffs.... (lol) So... it's 8pm... and I am going on... 34 hours with only 2 1/2 hours of sleep... no wake up pill help at all... ohhh.... at least I don't have a hang over.... (lol)

I figured if anyone really wanted to get to know me they would look through my journal so here I'm going to add some info about myself... boring as I am...



Born and raised in California... uhhhh... can you get much closer to hell?? I think not... I guess getting use to the heat before hand makes hell alittle more bareable... *smirks*



Upon graducation from HS I moved east... WV to be exact.... WV state moto?? " WV where the men are men and the sheep are scared" .. lol Then it was off to Memphis, TN.... great town...Had a job.. my own place and was pretty much getting by... then... I was tricked into leaving for SC... to take care of a sick family member... who was "on her death bed"... So far she still hasn't died yet.... I'm having my doubts about the whole sick thing...Needless to say she and I had a falling out and so I was forced to move back to WV where I lived in my grandparents attic until I got my own place... worked the graveyard shift at a all night pancake house.... ohhh.. isn't it fun to serve waffles to drunks at 4am??....



I got fed up with the " you must conform to our rules in this small town" and moved back to Memphis, TN.... Got hooked up with a guy who cost me about $19,000.... and a stint in the looney bin....something about the razor blades up the arms and blood on the bathroom walls forced my family to call the "white coats"... lol I felt I was just fine... but then again.... who am I to say who is sane and who isn't??



Well.. at the time there was not much goth action in Memphis.. that is until I decided to move again.... and then they came out of the shadows and banned together to form a new group.. but alsas.... my plans were set in motion... I sold everything I owned and moved back to CA... where I am at the present moment... so in a total of 8 yrs I've moved... 7 times..... can we say unstable?? I'm sure we can if we try hard enough..... so.. my plans now??? I don't know... like I said in my profile... I'm just here... for now.... who knows what the future holds....